Written by Remi Aubuchon, Directed by Bruce Seth Green

Guest starring Josh Hopkins as Matt Prophet, Gary Marks as Eddie Naiman, Timothery Omundson as Travis Cutler, Christine Dunford as woman running workshop, and Harry Shearer

Co-starring

Featured Musical Artists: Peggy Lee, James Michael

Jill: "I'm gonna ask Jack out."
Barto: "I think you should brush your teeth first."

Barto: "It's like my brain's been shot full of lidocain."
Jill: "Barto, you know what, your brain's not full of lido it's full Audrey. I mean, have you even talked to her since... since..."
Barto: "...since the unfathomable sex that clearly meant nothing to her?"
Jill: "Well, I was gonna put it nicer, but yeah, that."

Matt: "The what isn't nearly as important as the why, and the why comes from people."

Jill: "First she cancels on me, then she stands me up. And what do I do? I just keep coming back for more, y'know. It's like an all-you-can-eat abuse bar... for starving masochists."
Barto: "For what? For who?"
Jill: "I just can't... I can't figure it out, y'know. It's like, she seems into me, and then she doesn't."
Barto: "I think that's actually a female genetic disorder, specific to apartment 2E."

Audrey: "I think you should find somebody else to sleep with narcissistic ass."